Tweak: Growing Up on Methamphetamines (2007) by Nic Sheff
Nic Sheff, a writer and drug addict in recovery, writes a very detailed account of his experiences cycling through addiction, recovery, and relapse. He is a gifted writer and storyteller, and paints a vivid picture of his journey that is oftentimes very hard to read [trigger warning]. Reading this book back-to-back with his father’s version of the same story was interesting in that I already knew the timeline of events and knew what was coming next. It also provided an incredible perspective to get both sides of the same story and see how they came together in different endings. This book provides incredible insight into the mind, experience, and thought process of an addict in a way that can bring out a whole host of emotions to include empathy and compassion, as well as anger and frustration as an outsider who can see things so clearly. A significant part of Nic’s healing journey is his capacity to identify how he is lacking a connection with his core sense of self and the cultivation of co-dependent/insecure attachment traits and behaviors with others as an attempt to survive, and how these new insights (and the courage to heal) comes within the context of safer and healthier relationships (comparable to what is described in the Power of Showing Up). This book is a 12-hour rollercoaster of grief, frustration, anger, hurt, powerlessness; and hope, empowerment, and healing. But Nic’s journey does not end here and will continue to be a daily exercise in maintaining his recovery.
How did I hear about this book: Reading his dad’s book
Would I recommend it to colleagues: Absolutely
Would I recommend this to clients: Yes, I think it can be helpful for folks to read other people’s stories to gain insight, understanding, hope, and/or help to devise realistic expectations about their own journeys. For addicts/alcoholics working on their own recovery, this could be a good book to read to see themselves in someone else’s story. For family members, it could be a great opportunity to better understand and empathize with the experience of the addict (I love what Nic says toward the end when he verbalizes to his parents “it’s not like I’m just having a good time when I’m using… it is all pain. I mean, maybe 4 years ago when I first started this was all fun. But now it is just desperate and pathetic.”
How do I apply this content to my work: A mixture of personal and professional experiences often leave me sitting in the middle of both Nic and David Sheff’s stories. As a result, I find myself in a unique position of being able to work well with clients healing from either side of addiction. Additionally, the work I do is a complex amalgamation of training and perspectives to support the healing process from the complexity of addiction–the mental health/trauma, the bio-psycho-social-spitual aspects, relapse prevention skills, the way that the substances and the addiction itself has impacted the brain and the nervous system, the impact on the body and the need to effectively connect the body and the person in it, etc. In Nic’s story, his most successful treatment experience was one that included a diverse approach of treatment modalities and supportive healers. And my experiences and training mirrors this approach.
If you are in Washington state and need help healing from your struggles with drug or alcohol use, I may be able to help. Click here to schedule a free 15-minute consultation to find out more.
Disclaimers: These reviews are based on my own personal experience reading these books and do not reflect on the book’s author or publisher. I have not received any commissions or other incentives to promote my reviews. My reviews express my own unbiased opinions.
